Monday, April 13, 2009

eugenics

Bo and The Godfather

One of the reasons I like having Obama in the White House is that I don't have to worry. I know I probably should, but what counts is that I don't feel like I have to. Maybe it's just the contrast; Bush scared the bejeezus out of me. I do keep my ear to the rail, but I haven't heard anything alarming thus far. Good reason, I guess, to pay attention, especially when the water is flat calm. Like, just before a squall hits.

Oh dear. Storm warnings. Right when I was having myself a sigh of relief, the Easter Bunny showed up with a purebred Portuguese Water Dog named Bo for Sasha and Malia Obama (beware the ironclad campaign promise). Being people of conscience, their parents had been looking forward to rescuing a shelter dog. In addition, the First Lady has planted an organic vegie patch out by The Rose Garden. That's what I mean; you can trust that they're good people. Anyway, before they could do the decent thing for some needy hound, Teddy Kennedy stepped in and offered a puppy from some eugenic breeder (probably one of those kajillion Kennedy cousins). Obama is wise enough not to mess with the double karmic load of Teddy being genuine American royalty plus a cancer patient. If you're the new President, you probably ought not to mess with that old political icon for any reason anyway. So the result is, even in this 21st Century, there's still a Kennedy in the White House.

The First Daughters looked at what the breeder had to offer and of course chose the dog who most resembled a stuffed animal. Eugenics gave the sweet little thing adorable curly hair, cleverness and a bouncy personality. Totally irresistible to the two girls, but just wait until the family, not to mention the whole White House staff, get a load of what "bouncy" means in Portuguese. A PWD is one of those kinds of dogs you should never let be in charge. As if there's a choice. I wonder if any human can truly outsmart a clever dog.

Then there's that pesky word "water". It's the PWD's middle name, for dog's sake. They have to have water and lots of it. They were bred for water sports. Last time I checked, there's no sizable lake, let alone the preferred ocean, at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. I can see how this is going to turn out; that clever dog will wind up living out his days surfing the sunny beaches of Oahu. By the way, I have no doubt that PWDs can learn to surf.

5 comments:

Jala Pfaff said...

Jazzy and Mojito wanted me to type this for them; they said to tell Garrett that screw the PWD, they had great fun at Garrett's house today.

Samartdog said...

I also have no doubt that Garrett can surf as well as any PWD.

Jala Pfaff said...

But can he surf the Net? Ah, this is another thing altogether... :)

Jala Pfaff said...

P.S. What's with that Anonymous comment??!!

Samartdog said...

As for the cowardly insult from Anonymous, small minds don't sign.

A special message to Anonymous: You eat bait. Gotcha, you fool!